Skimmed the draft sent to backers today, found the following:
Rock baboons lair description, only “babo” is bold, missing the ons
Polar bear: “Characters clambering into the hole crawl will discover a 10’ long tunnel” Is crawl a verb or a noun here?
Blink dog: “The pack leader is well aware of how valuable his offspring is” offspring are?
Blood hound: “mentioned frequently for his dark and abominable deed in local folklore” deeds?
Cat, Panther: “but for now they remain a fiercely loyal kin-grip” kin group?
Cat, Sabre-Toothed: “Adventurers who bypass the den without taking appropriate precautions to mask their travels may marked by the troop leader as potential prey” → may be marked
Centipede, Giant: “while their legs and mandibles are worth 3gp each as special components” Presumably per centipede and not per leg?
Chimera: “The chimera themselves” Previously chimera has been pluralized as chimeras
Child of Nasga: “The floor of the gallery is cracked with age and vines grown from the cracks in many places” Vines grow?
Got bored at cockatrice, started skimming faster.
Faravahar, weren’t satrapis the domains of satraps? Use of satrapi as a title is somewhat confusing.
Monsters don’t get Wisdom? Even just as a bonus to saves against spells?
In the beastman components table, “Bubear, dire”
Dao component spells, “invisible” should be invisibility?
Flay fiend component spells, why parenthesized?
Vampire components spells, “torpor (blood)” ?
Carcass scavenger component spells, “swift strike” → swift sword?
Sidebar on square-cube law, “A giant tarantula’s weighs 500lbs” → giant tarantula weighs
Sample monster creation, “With a weight of 1,380lbs., the double-headed eagle is a With a weight of 1,380lbs, the double-headed eagle falls within the Large size category”
“As creatures of elemental earth, Dao are very strong” Capitalization of Dao inconsistent with previous paragraphs
Dire orc description, “Each gang encountered has a 10% chance to be mounted on on giant boar.” double-on
Dire ogre description, “There is a 75% chance thata dire ogre camp” → that a
Hyena header, “Hyena, Giant (Hyaenodon” is missing close-paren
Khepri description, “the dominant race in Aurëpos in era before man” an era before man?
“from time to time hapless adventurers will stumble upon on of the ancient vaults” upon one of
Kraken description, “Kraken able to swallow whole creatures of man size or smaller” are able
Leyak description, “This affect passes if the leyak leaves the victims range of vision, or if the leyak engages in combat.” victim’s, effect?
Zaharan description, “slaves sorcererously bred” sorcerously